这么近那么远

最近常常会无缘无故地想起吉米。。 好久好久没有把他的名字挂在嘴边了。。 感觉开始陌生。。 遥远。。 但是回想起来。。 我跟他所有的记忆都非常清晰地在我脑海里。不知不觉，已经过了8年了。。 而过去的每一年，他总是用他的电话祝福陪我度过生日。。

今年的生日。。 在没有收到他的电话祝福下过去了。心情非常复杂。又怕他会打来。。 但是没打来心里又牵挂。。 不知道自己到底是想怎么样？

在我注册结婚的三个月前，我拨了电话给他。一方面是想要通报我的喜讯，另一方面是因为我不知道在结了婚之后，该不该继续跟他联络。其实心里是知道答案的。。 可是还是会舍不得。 毕竟我们大家也不是在做什么不安份的事啊。想必这就是大家所说的做贼心虚吧。

那时在电话中听到我的喜讯，我听得出吉米有小小的失落。可是他也不忘恭喜我。 我们两个就很勉强地说了些客套话。 之后放了电话。。 他传了简讯说虽然失望，不过还是要恭喜我。看了之后我真的不知道怎么回他。最终也没有回复。到了我生日的时候，没有收到他的电话， 我也很清楚知道我可能这一辈子都不会再听到他的声音了。就连很单纯的想问他过的好不好都变得好困难。像是我对不起他似的。

不知道是一种幸福还是一种折磨。虽然已经不再联络，不过在Facebook还能得知他的近况， 看到他最近的样子。有时候看得了很开心，有时候又很伤心。

我到底该怎样把你彻底的忘掉呢？

一天一天日日夜夜面对面
既相处也同眠
一天一天逐渐逐渐便发现
纵相对却无言
静静默默望着熟悉的背面
一弯身影原来离我多么的远
像天涯那一端
无法行前一寸

我留着你在身边
心仍然很远
也许终于都有天
当你站在前面
但我分不出这张是谁的脸

我留着你在身边
心仍然很远
我想伸手拉近点
竟触不到那边
就欠一点点 但这一点点
却很远

触摸不到揣摸不到这么近那么远却仍然
双宿双栖不声不响我跟你已改变已无言
静静默默望着陌生的背面
心中所想原来离我多么的远
像天涯那一端
无法行前一寸

我留着你在身边
心仍然很远
也许终于都有天
当你站在前面
但我分不出这张是谁的脸

我留着你在身边
心仍然很远
我想伸手拉近点
竟触不到那边
就欠一点点 但这一点点
却很远

i think one of the biggest reason why i love my hubby so much is because he alwaes keeps me grounded by the most basic principles in life.

he makes me see that a lot of things in life don't matter if u know how to look far and plan ahead.

so u've taken a fall today, so wat? if u get up and walk again, u r stronger than those who's nv fallen.

so u have been accused wrongfully, so wat? if ur conscience is clear, time will prove all things wrong. rem, "sticks and stones may break my bones, but words will nv hurt me".

i hope the above kind of sums up wat i'm trying to say. it's jus that with so many tragedies going on ard us.. i realli dun understand why some ppl still insist of making other ppl's life miserable for no particular benefit of their own. these selfish, narrow-minded and bitter ppl are truly the typical "ugly singaporean".

i think some singaporeans realli have it too good in their lifes that they forget abt the basic principles of life. wat's happened to compassion, forgiveness and consideration? and the most basic of them all - courtesy. i realli do not understand girls who are walking-swearing-machines. wat are they trying to prove? that they have a flair for insulting ppl, particularly their parents? such obnoxious behaviour has realli got to be eradicated if Singapore wants to be a civilised society.

after wat i wud call "an unpleasant episode with the ignorant", i have come to be secretly proud of myself that i can put my point across with hurling a single word of vulgarity. it did not even cross my mind to do that cuz it was realli unnecessary and uncalled for. and i believe that ppl who do that do it out of a guilty conscience and a pride too big for their own good.

i recognised that the situation was gg a place that was way out of my league and class, so i walked away. after all, i have oredi gotten my point across and how they took to it and realli none of my business.

this episode realli got me thinking - are human beings taking things for granted? that everyday we wake up, we will have nice clothes to wear, good food to eat and happy ppl ard us all the time? when was the last time we felt thankful for the bed u sleep on every night, the ppl who were/are there for you during your down times and the colleague who buys lunch for u sometimes?

it makes me think abt the movie "pay it forward" when i think abt such things. and that like the boy, i am going to pay it forward by learning how to let go of grudges and start by being nice to ppl, whether they are nice to me or not.

ultimately, i want to leave this world with a smile on my face with tears of joy and be able to look back and hope i made a difference in ppl's life..

so to the girl in my "unpleasant episode with the ignorant" - i hope u live a happy life ahead and may our paths nv cross each other's again - if not for happy occasions.

*Life is too short to have hate and regret in it. Fill it up with joy, happiness and lots of love!*

i've hit one of those dry spells in terms of updating my blog. perhaps i have not had time to myself.. hence have not had time to formulate thots in my mind to blog abt.

i find myself losing myself more and more these days.

everyday i go to work, finish my work, go home. eat dinner, watch tv, go to bed. the next day it happens all over again. when the weekends come, i am alwaes gg to baby showers, birthday parties, wedding dinners, family dinners. no joke.. this has been the case for a few months now. it was fun initially, but i am realli tired of it now. i jus want to have time, for myself.

i am so tired of going out.. so much so that i have not been out with friends, neither have i been out on my own..

i have jus been holing up at home, (or rather "room") watching re-runs of F.R.I.E.N.D.S, "How I met your mother", "Whose line is it anyway", "The Ellen DeGeneres Show", "Oprah" and whatever the TV shows.

i don't realli kno what i want to do with myself. lately i find myself doing things on auto-pilot mode. i'm jus doing it.. not realli immersing in it.

did i also mention how much i am hating work right now? i realli hate it. EVERYTHING abt it.

all of a sudden, the devil inside me is back.. the one i've spent years trying to curb it from re-surfacing again.. has resurfaced.

i hate myself right now.

POSB "Rain" TVC

I know thisad has been ard for a while.. in fact it is probably no longer seen ard these days. but i especially like it because of the very beautiful girl in it.. and somehow she reminds me of the younger me. perhaps it's the sch uniform and the ponytail with fringe.



every time i see the part when the girl's face light up upon seeing someone coming to her with a brolly in the rain.. i think back to those days when i was in primary sch and my mom would alwaes be waiting for me to come home in the sch bus downstairs our hse with the brolly when it rains. those days are my happiest cuz i get to see my mom 15 min earlier than usual. it's jus something very magical abt standing in the bus and seeing my mom appearing larger and larger outside the bus.. her eyes darting ard looking for me as i alight the bus.

maybe i am missing my mom. or my childhood.

anyhow, this is one of my favourite ads ever.

You will never bring me down.

Having you as a friend, or so I thot, has been one helluva crazy rollercoaster ride.

On the surface, you seem confident, generous, gentle, kind, funny, sincere and RICH. bottom-line, u portray yourself to be someone who has the PERFECT LIFE.

but, I, me, KELLY LIM. I kno the real you. you are a persistant liar. you are insecure, selfish, vicious, jealous and have a totally rotten personality and flawed character. worse of all, u pretend to be rich to get with the rich.

if i haven't been a forgiving friend to u, i dunno who has. my heart had to be THIS BIG to put up with all the crap and lies you've fed me with. and guess wat i got at the end of the day, YOU BLAMING ME FOR YOUR SUFFERINGS.

get a life, bitch. if u can't tell who ur true friends are, at least wake up your idea and see through your plastic-surgeried eyes wat the real world is like. NOTHING LIKE HOW U IMAGINE IN YOUR TWISTED MIND.

i want you to know that all that has ever happened to you is a result of ur own doings. i bet you wud have nv guessed that your past and your lies have finally caught up with u and instead of coming clean, u try to cover them up with even more lies. i am sick and tired of being your "accomplice" and being blamed for the repercussions of your own wrongdoings. when is this ever gonna end? when are u going to realise that it is not that I do not know wat u do, but that I do not want to expose and embarrass you?

u have definitely stepped on the wrong tail.. i kno so much of ur dirt that u cud nv destroy me. i have been an honest person to all my friends and my integrity can be vouched by anyone who knows me.

and you?? i guess only your parents can vouch for you. (that's if they even know u at all.)

I have given you more chances than you deserve and more benefit of doubt than u can even imagine. i believe my job here is done.

and for the sake of our friendship for the past 12 years, i wish you nothing but the best.

GOODBYE!

Do You Want To Be Happy?

a lot of drama gg on in my life lately. strange enuff.. it is alwaes someone else's drama.. yet for even stranger reasons, i alwaes get dragged in.

i had so much gg on in my mind last night, i could not sleep. maybe i am too innocent.. or too simple. the things i want in my life, i oredi got them.. my priorities may be different from most.. but i can say confidently that i have nv been happier with how my life's turned out so far.

i like happy ppl. the sincerely happy ones. i enjoy being ard them. they make the world seem like a better place.. and give hope to the diminshing kindness in human race.

most of the time, i like to be that happy person to influence those ard me. but sometimes, i get misunderstood as being insensitive, critical and selfish.. when all of that was just the happy me trying to be funny.

"Sticks and stones may break my bones, but words will never hurt me." :)

maybe enthusiasm is not for everyone and not everyone wants to be happy.

3 birthday cakes and counting!

I know I am loved when it's my birthday tomorrow and I've already blown out candles for 3 birthday cakes! (and they are not shared.. it's my cake and mine alone!)

Oct 13 - Kbox with my Girlies (Rive Gauche Chocolate Cake - My all-time fave! Girls, u know me best! Hugs!)
Oct 17 - Swensens with ex-mj colleagues (Swensens Ice-cream Cake - no ice-cream cake gets better than this! Thanks, guys!)
Oct 22 - Meeting room with C&W colleagues (Fruit cake from downstairs office - haha.. thot that counts!)

I wonder if I am going to get more cakes this weekend??

I FEEL SO LOVED! :)))))))))))

我不需要Tiffany...

Pre-Birthday Celebrations - Oct 13

My babes and i headed to Kbox for their buffet dinner cum karaoke session to celebrate my birthday this year.. it was a simple but happy affair and the babes bought me the super delicious Rive Gauche chocolate cake!


It was double celebration for me as it was also the same day i passed my driving test! so here i am posing with my cake and P Plate! It is super reflective!

thanks to the babes for alwaes making my birthday fun and memorable. the birthday wish i made that day was to be able to celebrate my birthday with u girls every year for the rest of my life. :)

HUGS ALL!

Lowdown on my driving experience!

Basic Theory Test - Passed on 3rd attempt - 2004 during my poly days
Final Theory Test - Passed on 1st attempt - 2 May 2008
1st Driving Lesson - 3 Jun 2008
1st Practical Test - Failed with 40 pts - 15 Aug 2008
2nd Practical Test - Passed with 12 pts - 13 Oct 2008

Got my license in 5 months! (if i had passed on 1st attempt, i would have gotten it in 3 months lo!)

Yes I am still very excited abt passing my driving test! :D

Mrs. Lee has a DRIVING LICENSE!

i passed my driving test! it is now officially legal for me to operate a motorcar on public roads! i can park! i can lane-change! I CAN DRIVE!!

ok enough of shouting. truth is i am absolutely DELIRIOUS and EXCITED and can't wait to drive this weekend!! BUT i have to tone down a little bit cuz even on a normal day i am an overly dramatic person so imagine me NOW. *trying my bestest best to contain my excitement in ofc!*

before i went for my test this morning, mr. lee commented that i was gg to pass cuz i had no confidence for the test AT ALL. and i replied him, "how cud it be? i drove realli well during my 1st test and they failed me. THEY FAILED ME! i dunno wat to do for test this time. i oredi did my best during the last. i realli think dun i will pass this time also."

he jus stared at me and smiled. "don't worry, u will pass."

and true enough, I did. and i am still puzzled! today is THE absolute worst i've ever driven. not ONE OF THE WORST but THE ABSOLUTE WORST!

during my 1st test, i got the killer test route 6. i mus be damned to be so "lucky" to get the worse one out of 8 routes to pick from! and u wud nv guess that during my 2nd test today.. I GOT THE SAME BLOODY ROUTE!! i realli almost cried when i found out but well.. like i said earlier.. i had no intention of passing today so my attitude was jus "to hell with it!" and whack all the way!

so like i alwaes tell everyone proudly, my circuit executions are normally flawless.. the slope, ramp, vertical parking, horizontal parking, directional change and crank course. i have the absolute flair for "catching" the correct spots and angle to turn/reverse. even for my 1st test, i left the circuit for the public roads demerit point-less!

and today.. OMG.. i parked the worse vertical parking and only a so-so horizontal parking. the directional change was the worse.. i almost mounted the kerb! and i only mounted the kerb ONCE in my whole driving lesson history! so i asked for a re-do and even with the re-do.. the car was not straight and i reversed like 3 or 4 times to make sure it looked like it was in the correct position (when it was not, of cuz). my hands were trembling at that point! but by sheer luck.. i managed to pull out of the lot alive.

when i went on the road.. i was realli lucky.. the roads were as clear as can be...! AMAZING! i changed lane with ease and hardly any feeling of panic. i failed at lane-changing for my last test (even tho i felt i did quite well! :P) so i was exceptionally careful this time with the 3 lane changes for this killer test-route.

during my 1st test, i peeped at the testers laptop every few minutes to monitor my demerit points.. but i realised that was too stressful.. so this time, i refrained from looking until the last 5 minutes of the test route, when i cudn't stand it anymore.. i took a quick peep at the laptop and saw 12 points! then i started to repeat to myself in my head, "pls drive as careful as a mouse back to school.. pls pls pls pls.."

and 5 minutes later.. i was back at sch.. sitting at the tester's office.. and collecting my result script with the big fat PASS printed. *WOOHOO!*

ok now comes the most bizarre part of all.

the 1st tester i had durign my 1st test was friendly, encouraging and spoke very very kindly. i thot.. i wud surely pass with a tester like that! but it turned out that he was pretty strict and became impatient towards the end, and even with my flawless driving (or so i thot) he failed me! (i was also kinda dressed to kill.. flowy short dress all. :p)

today, my tester had the most unfriendly face and the most disapproving tone of voice when he speaks.. and yet with my horrendous driving and flustered hands.. HE PASSED ME?! (i was covered from head to toe today??)

so u say la, weird or not?!

ok i am not saying that i am not happy la but it is jus weird, u kno? :p

*smiling at everyone today! even the jee-ko-peks on the trains! la la la la la..!*

apologies for this abrupt close of my entry. i am simply too delirious.. i can't think properly now!

The Return of the BOYBANDS!

There's been this sudden surge of boybands making a comeback in the pop scene recently and i must say.. it makes me feel old.. ok that was not my point. :p

to me, it's interesting to see what these folks from yester years look like now from the last time i saw them when i was.. well i think 16.

some scared me to death.. and some realli left my mouth gaping. judge for urself.

don't doubt this.. this was shot only this year.. HWO COME BOYZONE LOOKS BETTER THAN THEY DID 10 YEARS AGO? and i mean all 5 of them! the less-famous 3 look even better than they used to back in the heydays! "I realli dun geddit!"


NKOTB's gotta be the biggest surprise comeback this year. but i have to say only joey mcintyre is still ok looking.. jordan knight's eyes are so wrinkly! the rest.. gave a bit of creeps actually.. they're nothing more than uncles to me! i cudn't find the video on youtube but u guys shud totally check it out if u get the chance.. it is a little bit painful to watch 3 uncles act sexy!


what is BSB without kev.. he is like the mr. man of bsb! but anyhow.. they look pretty much the same.. jus a little bit more buffier (or fatter) and sporting a more ruffled up look. music's jus so-so.

so based on the above.. my vote goes to Boyzone for keeping so well in the aspect of looks and it is a bonus that the song is pretty catchy!

needless to say, i will be keeping a lookout for them in the next few months.. :)

Food for Thought.

Never underestimate the power of "I LOVE YOU".

The Phone Wars!

dun remember if i've blogged abt this before.. but i've traded in my trusty ol' nokia 6300 for the IT-savvy Sony Ericsson W960i..

this was a result of witnessing my sister using the phone and thinking to myself, "This phone is total coolness! i have to get it too!" and not realising that perhaps it was my sister who made it cool, and nothing at all to do with the phone itself.

so anywae.. within weeks, i became the proud owner of a W960i and also the 1st time owner of a Smart phone.. and truth be told.. i realised i am not exactly someone who needs so much technology on a day-to-day basis.. and i also realised i am not as cool as my sister who was using the phone with ease. i was having problems with adjusting to it.

and as most Smart phone owners would know.. they run on Symbian and system is prone to "hanging" when you have a lot of applications running at the same time. i will honestly say that i nv had this problem when i was using the traditional java programmed phones like my Nokia 6300.

so one month into owning the W960i, i got a bit irritated with its system alwaes hanging on me and its functions are way too complicated for my simple mind. but well.. the phone did cost me quite a bit.. so i decided to hold out until my mobile phone contract ends at the end of a 2-yr span.

at least that was wat i thot until 2 months into using the phone.. the mic gave up on me. it refused to work. whenever i had incoming calls, the person on the other line wud not be able to hear me AT ALL. i had to put up with the nonsense for 2 days until i finally decided..

I AM NOT SMART ENOUGH FOR A SMART PHONE. or perhaps i was just not destined for a Sony Ericsson.

and so i walked myself to the mobile phone service provider and traded in the W960i for a spanking new Nokia 6600 Slide.

yea, so i am a Nokia fan after all. its fashionista appearance and simple functions are jus perfect for someone like me - a bimbo.


i swear, these images do this phone an injustice.. it is so pretty in my hands!! and the best thing abt its interface (other than the fact it is java-supported, not Symbian) is that, it is like an upgraded version of my Nokia 6300.. and i am truly loving it! (i dun remember being this excited when i laid my hands on the W960i for the 1st time - if anything i felt lost using it!)

I guess the moral of my story is.. the good stuff might not suit you the best.. i.e. mai gei kiang! :p

i've learnt my lesson well this time!

Call me MRS LEE! :p

IT WAS PERFECT.

My ROM turned out absolutely perfect. God has been kind to me. Weather was great, guests were merry, family and good friends were all present. i didn't exactly make a personal definition of wat wud make a perfect ROM but it jus turned out the way it was - PERFECT!

I will need time to put up pictures so pls be patient.

Most imptly, thank you to all those who made it special.. each and every single one of you I invited - u hold a special place in my heart and i am grateful u have shared a very precious moment with me on Sunday. My deepest apologies for not being able to spend time with all of you but I will make up for you in the coming days - dinner or something. :)

i think i will need to revise the meaning of BLOG. it is not an abbreviation for weblog but more like backlog.

BACKLOG = B-LOG = BLOG (i have so many things to blog abt but have jus absolutely NO TIME!)

so hard to be a responsible blogger!!! but i will strive to be one as hard as i strive to be a good wife!!

*blissful smile!*

没有丑女人，只有懒女人

i kno i owe u guys the post abt my bachelorette party.. but that is going to be a huge one so it has to wait!! i am amidst the madness of my ROM preparations.. we are 3 days away!!!! *gasp!* following that i will also post details of the actual day, of cuz.. :)

but for now.. want to share a good deal with u peeps.

i am into the last days of my ROM preparations and doing all the last minute beauty treats i can possible find. (this includes sleeping early everyday from today to sunday!)

so i walked into SASA during lunch today to find some facial masks.. and chanced upon good ones at only SGD3.00 each!! (buy 2 get 1 free some more!! that means each sheet is only 2 bucks!)

So i grabbed 3 (one for each of the days before my ROM) and went to the counter to pay. when the cash register charged a total amount of SGD4.80 and i was like, "Huh?! so cheap?" then the lady explained that they were having a promotion and each sheet is only going for SGD1.60 each!!!

GOOD BUY LA!

but well i have not tried it yet so i did not rush back to grab more BUT i love SASA stuff so far so i have no doubt this will turn out good too.

some examples of great buys from SASA so far. and since my discovery on them, i have nv looked back! MUST-HAVES of my daily beauty regime!

this baby.. i cannot and will not live without it! it is pretty costly at SGD69.90 per bottle but i wud spend my last cent on it with no questions asked!!

this is not spectacular but it managed to replace my 60 bucks moisturizer and work just as well at only SGD19.90! What a steal, right?! and it is so powerful that u only need to use a little at a time and one tub realli goes a loooong way!

and back to the masks i was raving abt before i got sidetracked to my skincare miracles.. :p there are a variety of brands, scents and purpose (moisturize, collagen, relaxation) of masks for you to choose from and i was truly spoilt for chioce!

i am definitely going back to Sasa for more facial masks when i am finished with the 3!

there are simply no more excuses for girls to say that beauty maintenance is too expensive bla bla bla.

like ppl alwaes say, "世界上没有丑女人，只有懒女人"！

how true! :)

***SNEAK PREVIEW*** Bachelorette Party @ Hotel Naumi - Sep 6

STAY TUNED FOR MORE!!! :)

Good Shopping Day!

you know how there are days when u have a list of things to get and u jus can't seem to find a single thing from that list to buy? they are always either out of stock, or not available in the size/colour u want, or jus not the way u imagined it so u end up not buying them.

now THAT is a Bad Shopping Day. When you walk round and round and think abt whether u shud buy something or look ard some more but decide to buy nothing at the end of the day.

then there are also those days whereby every single shop u walk into, there is something that catches ur eye, and it happens to be one of the things on your to-buy list! so u end up with lots of choices but it is always easy to choose cuz there is alwaes something u like so much that u have already set ur mind to get it and u're jus looking ard at other options to "confirm" ur decision.

i love Good Shopping Days such as these and i had one of the best yesterday!

me and *him* both left office earlier to get an early headstart cuz we were afraid of having a Bad Shopping Day.

by 5pm, we were at tampines mall (cuz we had to pick up our rings there). the only cock-up that day wast hat when we reached the jewellery shop, they told us the dispatch had not come yet so our rings were not ready for collection. but since we had things we needed to buy, we decided to do the shopping while waiting to collect the rings.

so our list was short but i did not think it wud be easy getting them: white shoes and white belt.

the shoes were more of a headache cuz we originally had bought his clothes to match the existing white shoes that he had. but we only reaslised that they did not match when we put them all together. so now we had to go find another pair of white shoes that actually goes with wat we have.

we walked into the 1st shop and saw not 1, not 2, but 3 pairs of white shoes that wud fit the bill. and that we both atually liked all 3 of them! (hardly happens, we have quite distinctly different tastes.) but we decided not to be rash and walked ard some more.

in the next 3 shops we walked into, we managed to find something we like in all of them. but the decision was simple, our hearts were with the 1st 3 pairs we saw in the 1st shop. so now it;s jus to decide, which one shud it be?

we went back to the 1st shop and eliminated one pair and tried on the other 2 pairs and easily decided on one of them.

White shoes - DONE!

next we walked into 77th street to find us a nice white belt. now this didn't take much time nor decision-making skills. we walked in, there was a pretty white belt staring at us and we got that. simple!

after we paid and thot abt wat we shud do then as we were done shopping, the phone rang. our rings were here for collection!

Now, how cool is that? it's almost as if we had our timing all planned out!

after we were done, we went for dinner and when i glanced at my watch after dinner, it was only 7.16pm!

collection and fitting of rings, shoe shopping, belt shopping and dinner all in only abt 2 hours! AMAZING!

i think there must be a shopping god up there.. and thank u for blessing me with a good shopping day! i appreciate it very very much! i will repay u by doing more shopping!

*if only there was such a religion then shopping wud not be SINFUL!!*

My Vivid Imagination = Weird Dreams

as my sister alwaes says - "you alwaes have weird dreams."

i had a weird dream last night.

i dreamt that i was boarding an SBS bus.. and as i walked up the steps.. i looked into the face of the driver and found myself staring into the face of Barack Obama!

perhaps I have been seeing him telly too much.. i dunno! i am not even a fan of politics!

so it happens that i am the only person who recognised him so i uttered an "oh.. my.. god.." and everyone started to turn my way and realise who he is.

Obama then smiled kindly to everyone and asked all to be seated while he drives us all to an auditorium.

then, i find myself suddenly transported to the auditorium with the rest of the ppl in the bus (u kno how the places in ur dreams alwaes suddenly changes without u having to travel/walk??) and Obama has changed out of his driver's uniform and dressed in a smart suit now.

in his usual charismatic fashion, he stands at the podium and appears to be giving a speech, except the sounds and noises ard me are muted.. i can only see that he is happily waving at us. so i whipped out my camera and started to snap away. and suddenly, i realise that *he* is beside me.. *his* reaction was nonchalant - as is in real life. i pass my camera to *him* and ran down the auditorium to stand beside Mr. Obama and signalled for *him* to snap a picture for us.

following that, armies of ppl rushed down to do the same.. Obama's bodyguards then run out to escort him away from the mob of ppl and out of the auditorium. and throughout all these, his kind smile nv left his face.

if this is a premonition, i hope it's a good one! which makes me wonder.. cud my weird dreams be a form of premonition? premonitions that i dunno how to interpret??

oh i forgot to add that the dream ended with me being angry with *him* cuz when i checked the picture that *he* had taken for me and Obama, i saw only myself with the throng of ppl and Obama was nowhere to be found in the picture!

so there u go, one more addition to my "weird dreams"!

献给“模范棒棒堂”第一届低迪们。。

前一阵子有提过。。 家里为了要看模范棒棒堂而定了channel V。。 不知不觉就这样子看了快一年了。。 每个礼拜的星期一到星期五，只要我那天没事我一定都会看。。 就算有事我也一定会在节目开始前到家。。

而昨天。。 看了模范棒棒堂的第一届低迪毕业了。。 意思说他们所有人都会换上新低迪。。 也就是他们所谓的第二代低迪。。

而这是我好久以来在电视前面大哭了。。 好舍不得他们。。 为什么要毕业？做得好好的。。 为什么要换新低迪？真的真的好舍不得。。

在看完节目后，当下的心情。。 好比是要送走自己亲手养大了的小孩一样。。 非常心酸。

也不知道这节目是怎么做到的。。 它让它的观众都感受得到现场的气氛。。 和所有人的感动。。 让我这一年来好像交了一群新朋友一样。。 天天都想追看他们的生活点滴。。

而现在。。 第一届低迪离开后。。 没了那股想追看节目的心情了。。 谁知道哪一天当我适应了新低迪后，他们几时又要毕业了呢？

从我开始看节目到他们毕业。。 从不认识低迪们到每一个都叫得出名字来。。 我真的很不舍得啦。。六棒 - 敖犬，阿伟，威廉，小煜，小杰。 宅男暑 - Terry， Elmo，小禄，鳂鱼， 李泉，牙膏，虎牙。 公主帮 - 阿本，毛弟，小马，野兽，翰将，多多，小滨。还有一个最可惜的。。 小乐。。 他最无辜啦。。 上堂的时间才那么一下下。。 就要毕业了？！ 要是他早点被选进来。。 说不定他可能会是六棒其中之一。。 我相当看好他！

不过，不管我再怎么看好他。。 也没用啦。。 原本以为 channel v 会把小乐留下当班长。。 可是看来不可能了啦。。 第二节的新低迪们都已经选出来了。。 都没看到小乐半个影。 真令人失望！

唯一安慰的是。。 至少堂主还是大家熟悉的范范。。 而她也将会是最辛苦的。。 要重新和新低迪们认识，了解和培养默契。。 想必并不简单。。 想在这里跟堂主说。。 “加油！模范棒棒堂下来的命运就全靠你了！好好给它撑下去！”

第一届的低迪们 - 永远都会记得你们对模范棒棒堂的贡献。。 没有你们，就不会有今天的模范棒棒堂。。 你们不要永远消失，好吗？ 有空要回来看看我们。。 看看堂主。。 祝你们在未来的演艺生涯里大红大紫。。 为模范棒棒堂争光！

新低迪们。。 在前两晚看了你们的选拔过程。。 也知道大家都来头不小。。 希望你们也能像第一届低迪们一样。。 带给大家欢乐和喜悦。。 在接下来的日子里发光发热！

****** 最新消息！小乐将会过渡参加第二届低迪们的录影！继续在模范棒棒堂里现身！开心啦！******