Trip Down Memory Lane - Soul Searching

i think i got a lil too carried away with my joy and stuffed myself silly during the long weekend. well, simply cuz it was a long weekend! :)

so much so that i had indigestion on Monday and my stomach was bloated as if I was 4 months preggers. it was so uncomfortable. i didn't report to work that day.

so i stayed home, did my laundry, cleaned up the room a bit.. took many, many rests in between cuz the stomach feels better when i lie down.

and as i was clearing out some stuff in the room.. i came across this box of stuff. i mean, i alwaes knew it was there, but i jus nv bothered myself with it. and it was when i decided to clear it out and clean up that space that i found my old diaries in the box.

i was super excited. i had been looking for them a few weeks ago cuz i had all my diaries except those during the years 2002 and 2003 - which meant a lot to me cuz significant stuff took place during that period!

1. Jimi came to SG to see me in mid 2002
2. I had a whirlwind-romance-turn-disaster when i met my then-bf of 2 weeks in late 2002 (let's call him ZERO)
3. I met Des for the 1st time in late 2002
4. I met my future-hubby for the 1st time in early 2003 :)

Isn't it all very exciting?! HAHA. For me la. :p

I had such a blast going thru them and I sat in the same position reading them for a good 2-hours before I took my 1st break!

I am so glad I've kept diaries during my younger days. cuz it is the only way i can look back at myself and see the changes that have taken place. and reading thru my old diaires, i found that i have realli changed over the last 5 years.

i cringe sometimes when i read abt the stuff i wrote, i was so inconsiderate and self-centred in the early parts of my relationship with *him! i am so glad i am not that demon anymore!

and of cuz, there's the good, the bad and the ugly. i also saw some parts that i have forgotten (the fragile human memory). like how sweet *he had been to me (he still is, just in a different way) in the beginning and all the catching and chasing games we played before we finally got together. it was realli heartwarming and slightly hilarious when i read stuff like, "does he like me or not?", "how come he hasn't asked for my number?" or "i realli hope he is the one!" :p

the ugly bits will have to be those with ZERO in it. no doubt it ended horribly but i have to admit that they way he chased after me was very romantic indeed (somehow i managed to block him out completely in my head and conveniently forgotten all abt it). all happened too fast with him, but definitely romantic.

then i realised i had been very lucky to experience the different types of relationships throughout my younger days. i have had puppy love, i have had a teenage crush (yes, as a teenager, i had only liked one person throughout!), i have had a long distance r'ship, i have had a whirlwind romance, i have had rendezvous overseas (twice! - some call it 艳遇?), i have had 2 subtle rejections and also one memorable courtship that led me nowhere (but he will alwaes be remembered fondly).

and very very fortunately, i found the steadfast and everlasting love in *him.

i may not talk to most of the ppl i mentioned above anymore, but somewhere, somehow, they have molded me into the person I am today and led me to where i am today. and i really wouldn't have it any other way.

today, stop for a moment and think abt this - who are those who made an impact in your life so far?

i assure you, you will find regrets, as well as joy. but more importantly, i hope you find yourself then, and what you have become now. it will be gratifying, if not amazing.