kellykylie

the weekend had been a bizarre one. it was an emotional rollercoaster for me, even tho it had been a good one.

*he* was moving hse over the weekend and so i was left to spend time by myself. i am quite used to that so i had no issue with the proposal. however, since his family was busy with the moving, he'd asked me to go help out for both sat and sun at the market. i wondered if the others knew i was the one tiding them over their duties, or they simply thot my mom cud manage one weekend w/o them. (she cud, it wud jus b a bit hectic.. help on weekends wud still very much be appreciated, apparently.)

i cud not help but wonder wat went thru their minds if they knew i was helping out while they moved. and if they didn't kno, why didn't *he* tell them? sigh. there i go thinking abt senseless stuff like these again. by sunday morning i became immune, cuz i knew i was nv going to get answers for my questions.

i've helped out at the biscuit shop previously, many times in fact. but i've nv been there alone. it was alwaes with *him*. wat more it was for 2 days in a row this time, by myself. saturday was extremely hard for me. i was bored. time passed so quickly when *he* was there.. talking cock and laughing ourselves silly in tt tiny shopfloor space. plus i kept wondering if his family knew i was doing this for them and if they cud somehow appreciate it. my mind was in such a riot.

by saturday night, i was a bit restless. he'd not called/msged the entire day. i figured he'd been busy. when he did call later that night, i was too upset to speak with him. he knew but he did not press for a reason. he'd felt guilty for not having spent time with me for the past 2 weeks.

i've tried to be as understanding as i possibly cud. but i cud not help getting upset somehow. i did not take it out on him this time tho. i kept to myself mostly.

on both mornings, he came to pick me up to send me to the market. i appreciated that very much. at least he is putting in that wee bit of effort that meant so much to me. he also made a point to haf breakfast with me both of the mornings. and each ended with him buying back food for his family. made me wonder if he had breakfast with me and then bought breakfast for them out of convenience or he had to buy them breakfast so had breakfast with me out of convenience. seriously, why can't i jus haf a much simpler mind??

sunday had passed surprisingly easily for me. my mom kept me very busy at the shop and before i knew it, it was time to pack up and go home. boy, was i glad i finished my 2 days of "shop duty".

so my weekend went by jus like that. i dun feel like it was any different from a weekday cuz i didn't get to see *him* much. this friday we're going to a wedding tgt, let's hope it'll be a good thing for us. at least i get to see him, if not spend quality time.

it's monday again. and i realised ever since i quit advertising, i haven't had monday blues anymore. :) looks like i made the right decision this time.. by not going back into the industry. i think i'll able to hold out here longer than the other places i've been.

keeping my fingers crossed!