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♫ Stuff In My Head ♫

Tuesday, April 06, 2010

Middle Child Syndrome

"The middle or second born child or children often have the sense of not belonging. They fight to receive attention from parents and others because they feel many times they are being ignored or dubbed off as being the same as another sibling. Being in the middle a child can feel insecure. The middle child often lacks drive and looks for direction from the first born child. Sometimes a middle child feels out of place because they are not over achievers and like to go with the flow of things.

Being a middle child would mean they are loners. They really don’t like to latch on to a person in a relationship, there fore they have trouble keeping one due to lack of interest. Not liking to take the limelight for anything, they are not over achievers and just simply work enough work to get by, and typically that goes with school as well as a career. They are however very artistic and creative. If forced to use abilities they will work well, but do not work well under pressure. They often start several projects but rarely keep focused long enough to finish a project. The best career move for a middle child would be along the lines of using their creative. Going into a writing or journalism career, and into a career that they could freely express themselves would be good. Anything that would have hours that are flexible, and projects that frequently changed would be good for a middle born child. Since relationships are not of high importance to a middle child, often times they are alone. However, the best possible match for a middle child would be a last born."


The only thing from the above that is true for me, as a middle child, is the career part. I do need a lot of flexibility in my work and I do think that I belong to the creative field in terms of writing.. but I never chased my dreams.

But everything else, is CRAP! I value relationships A LOT and I quite enjoy being the middle child!

And also, I define a loner as someone who is incapable of making and retaining friends. So how am I a loner?? I do enjoy spending time with myself, but I do have many friends!

You know, the best thing about being the middle child, is that you are naturally freed from ALL RESPONSIBILITIES! The eldest sibling will normally be expected to do this, to be that, cuz they are the oldest. So me, being the middle child, is spared from a lot of expectations, hence, having more time for self-exploration, to become the person I was born to be, not restricted by any responsibilities and expectations (hence I like to believe that we are more creative).

The next reason, is a personal one. Or rather a personality reason. I have never liked to be looked upon as someone who needs to be baby-ed. That I would not be able to survive on my own if I had been required to be in such a situation. I like to know that ppl think I am a hardy person, like a tough cookie. Independent and confident. Hence, being the youngest in the family would not have helped me much in that area. Which is why I like being the middle child, that I am still playing the older sibling role to someone, despite not being the eldest. Without the responsibilities, of course!

You can call me weird, but I also kinda liked the fact that my mom always paid more attention to my elder sister and younger brother than she did me. Cuz then I was allowed to do anything I wanted, without any supervision (outings with boyfriends, late night escapades with girlfriends etc)! I count myself very lucky that I turned out to be an alright-kid despite given so much freedom during my younger days.

Lastly, because I am the middle child, my older sister has broken all the house rules for me so that when my time came, I no longer had to negotiate curfews or ask for more pocket money cuz someone has already set the standards for me, and they are pretty good, trust me! I guess this is a case-by-case thing, if you are a party animal and your older sibling is a bookworm.... it's just too bad yo! I certainly had a good childhood and it was largely due to my super cool older sister!! She broke all the rules and at the same time, assumed all the responsibilities an older sister should. I guess anyone in my shoes would have loved being a middle child!

So tell me, what is so bad about being a middle child? I loved it and am still loving it!

This post was inspired by Karen Cheng's post here.