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♫ Stuff In My Head ♫

Monday, July 26, 2010

I love listening to you talk about you!

You know last week I was feeling damn emo. DAMN DAMN DAMN EMO. I suddenly feel that friendships are a lot of work and I may be wrong but I feel like I am the only one putting in the effort sometimes. I am truly tired of it all. It doesn't quite help when I begin to realize that some of my friends are taking me for granted.

I have been crazy calling my friends, trying to get someone to come out and spend some time with me.. I had some troubles at work and I really needed to get it out of my system.

One by one, they told me they're not free, they're working, meeting bf.. bla bla bla. And some of them, I called not once, but twice in that week. And each time I hang up the phone, none of them asked if there was anything urgent. Not that there was, but I mean.. I call them, they ramble on about whatever it is they are busy with, I listen. Then the call ends with either one of the scenario below:

A. Friend says, "Ya so that's what happened lo. Eh I gtg, bye!"

B. I say, "Oh I see.. eh got time not? Wanna meet?"
Friend says, "I can't.. got appointment le. Sorry ar. Next time k? Bye!"

It makes me wonder.. do I really have friends? Maybe I can't tell that ppl don't like me? Even.. *gulp* friends whom I've known for more than 20 years.

Or perhaps my life has never had any major hiccups and even if I did, I was always able to manage on my own, without any help.

But even so, I wasn't asking for help.. I only wanted someone to talk to. No one even asked me the basic question of why I called them in the 1st place. It is very depressing. :(

So last weekend, I was home and sulking. When the husband forced me to tell him what's wrong, I said, "Nobody wants to talk to me. I can't get anyone to talk to me. I listen to everyone talk about their troubles at work, at home, themselves.. but no one wants to listen to me talk abt me anymore."

"I love listening to you talk abt you, isn't that enough?"

At that, I cudn't disagree and I stopped sulking.

Isn't he just the sweetest.

Note: I know some ppl don't like to read about other ppl's lovey-dovey stuff but I am not exactly writing this for other ppl to see. It is more of a reminder for myself, when I am old and grey and perhaps not so happy in my marriage anymore, i will look back at these posts and be reminded of how much he loved me/loves me. So I apologise if it makes you uncomfortable!

2 comments:

whimmykimmy said...

Hey silly girl, you can call me! We haven't met up or spoken a lot but here's another number to try k? :) Hope everything else is fine with you! - Kim

Anonymous said...

what abt me?! you totally left me out!! :( -Ling